Fundamentals that informs my work with you
“Yesterday I was clever and wanted to change the world, today I am wise, and I am changing myself” – Rumi
Congratulations in taking the first step to allow the life that you desire and deserve to emerge. I am honored to join you on this journey. We will talk, think, explore, question, process, and deliberate together until the image of your desired life becomes clear to you and you are equipped with the tools and skills to nurture it for many years to come. Below are some principles that will inform our work together.
“Lovers won’t finally meet somewhere. There are in each other all along” – Rumi
The quality of the relationships in our lives determines the quality of our lives overall. These relationships include those we have with food, money, children, partners, colleagues, and so on. We know that having a secure and fulfilling bond with another human being can lower our cortisol level and blood pressure and helps with our overall cognitive abilities and concentration. People who are in such relationships are not only healthier, but they are more productive at work and treat others with more compassion.
“If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?” – Rumi
When someone irritates us, it means that they deregulated our nervous system, commonly known as our gut. Many people assume the brain thinks and the body follows but, from recent studies in the fields of neurobiology and neurophysiology, we now know the opposite is true. The body assesses a situation and then sends signals to the brain, advising us to act in a certain way. When we perceive a threat, it takes about 20 minutes on average for our body to calm down so it can once again be responsive to a person or situation rather than reactive. In the process of our work, we will focus on strategies and tools with which you can equip yourself so that you present in the world with a polished gut, so you are more in control of the input your nervous system receives, and so you have tools to calm yourself in a triggering situation.
First, I will send you some forms to be registered in my online platform and also to give you a chance to share any information with me prior to our meeting (they will come through Relationship Panoramic). I will read what you share with me in detail so we can have a head start to our sessions. Please provide me with your full names and preferred email addresses so I can share these with you both if you are aiming to come in to the sessions as a couple.
I suggest that we meet initially for 2 hours to give us a chance to cover the main areas involved in your concerns; however, if this does not work for you we can meet for an hour and take it from there. We will conclude by setting some goals for our work so we can measure your progress along the way. You will also be given your first set of exercises (could be reading, practices, etc.). We will then agree over a set time for your weekly sessions or other frequencies depending on your needs. The ongoing sessions will be for about an hour unless we decide otherwise. During this process, there will be times that I would invite you to individual sessions to delve deeper into an issue.
Our sessions are not covered by insurances. If you would like to submit claims to your insurance, please consider contacting one of my other trusted colleagues in our practice who could see you and provide you with super-bill to submit to your insurance.
Our sessions remain online. You can log into the appointments from anywhere you each are. 48 hours prior to your sessions when the confirmation email goes out, you will also receive a link which you will use to come into our confidential online room for our session. You just need to get the app, click on the link, enter your name and you are in.
For those who are also participating in couples’ consultations, I highly recommend that you and your partner take the Relationship Panoramic Inventory (RPI) for an overview of the main dynamics in your couple bubble. If you are in multiple partnerships, I recommend that you take the inventory two by two so we can assess the interpersonal dynamics that exist in your overall relationship. The idea is that every dyadic relationship has strengths and weaknesses that should be identified to reduce the tension that arises from them. You can read more about it and take it here.
I hope this helps you to learn more about my process. Should you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact me.
*If there is a need for specific physical accommodation or if you are a public figure needing extra privacy, please let me know beforehand.